GERMAN MAN WELCOMES MUSLIM MIGRANTS BY ADOPTING THEIR CULTURE

Germany is rightfully famous for going out of its way to welcome migrants from the "Southern" lands. While some merely open their homes and wallets to the incomers, and others merely allow their daughters to be groped or worse, some Germans go even further to roll out the red, black, and gold carpet of welcome by actually adopting the culture of the incomers, most of whom are from Muslim countries.

This appears to have been what has happened in the scenic German town of Muenster, where a local German man apparently climbed into his van and did his own "truck of peace" drive, in honour of the many similar Muslim-jihadi-inspired incidents that have happened in Europe in the last few years:

The man killed two people when he ploughed the vehicle into people seated at tables outside the Grosser Kiepenkerl eatery, a popular destination for tourists in the old town of the university city in western Germany. He then shot himself dead.

“We now know it was in all likelihood a lone perpetrator, a German,” Herbert Reul, interior minister of North Rhine-Westphalia, home to Muenster, told reporters.

"I can't believe it's not Muslim."

The driver's name has still not been officially released, but police have assured us that he was in fact as German as a sausage stuck up the arse of man wearing leiderhosen while blowing a tuba full of sauerkraut. 

Indeed, his act of homage to the Muslim incomers was so "authentic" that many people were convinced that he was in fact an actual Muslim and couldn't believe it when they were told that he was merely a German jihadi-LARPer.

Two people were killed in the unscheduled act of reverse cultural assimilation, after which the driver shot himself like Hitler in his bunker.