INTERNET NOW COLLAPSING WITHOUT TRUMP

The internet, which has happily been existence since MySpace was launched in 2003, is now believed to be collapsing.

This follows the deplatforming of Donald J. Trump from several top sites, including Facebook, Twitter, Google, SnapChat, and Instagram, all of which were driven by either deep love of the ex-reality-TV-star-turned-President or an insatiable hatred of the "Bad Orange Man."

One Twitter user complained that life online had become practically meaningless, and that he now just wanted someone to come by and put him out of his misery like a horse with a broken leg.

Other Trump lovers and haters said that, without the garish, boorish, on-line persona of Donald Trump to either attack or defend on social media 24-7, they would have to return to their dull, pitiless existences and reflect on what failures as human beings they had truly become.

Without all the on-line love and hate directly generated by Donald Trump's various social media accounts, the number of likes, retweets, and reports for hate speech is now thought to be plummeting at such a rate that it may even cause a collapse in what scientists call the Waste-of-time/Space continuum that maintains the very fabric of the internet.

If this happens MySpace could theoretically expand to the size of a small sun followed by a Supernova explosion that would shower Facebook thumbmarks and emojis to the furthest, darkest corners of the Universe.