MILLENIYULE 2020: TRAD NEW'S PICK OF THE MILLENNI-YULES

 

It's that magical time of the year once more, the Milleni-yules, when Millennial Woes finally makes some new content after staring at his basement ceiling all year repeating his mantra "No, I am not a sex pest."

All those months of unspoken, pent-up words are set to burst forth in a 50-livestream extravaganza, like the waters of the Ruhr Dams cruelly breached by evil British bombers in a totally unprovoked attack, for which Woes has already apologised. 

Yes, at long last, the Woes drought is over, and a 2-week blitzkrieg of dissident chat, a Barbarossa of cozy questions, sighing pauses, and chuckling responses, is about to be unleashed on the YouTube faithful, featuring dozens of diverse dissident thought leaders, all of whom believe exactly the same thing, i.e. that Hitler Woes did nothing wrong. 

So, without more ado, here is Trad News's pick of the Millenni-yules:

Greg Johnson

The much esteemed founder of Counter-Currents e-zine, Greg Johnson has managed to break down the cruel barriers against gay men, like Millennial Woes and himself, in the Alt-right. Despite the deplatforming of his books and the demonetization of his content, the highly erudite Johnson is kept in bread and butter by a coterie of rich, gay donors around the world who like to LARP as a future Nazi elite. He is frequently seen attending Nazi conferences around the world, usually sharing a hotel room with a young acolyte with a Hitler Jugend haircut. In the few moments of leisure that his busy duties allow, Johnson prefers to don a sari at home and do impersonations of Savitri Devi.

Dangerfield

With an intellect that resembles a traffic light squeegee man, Dangerfield is probably the most trite, stupid, and low IQ person to make it through the rigorous Millenniyule selection process. He is a sleazy "sex-pat," based in Thailand, who openly boasts about having sex with shemales. He is also a leading light in Mark Collett's built-to-fail, Neo Nazi Patriotic Alternative party. Many Woes fans are asking why such a shit magnet was chosen. The answer is simple -- because Woes hopes that having a lady boy fucker on his show will encourage people to view his own sexual "irregularities" in a more favourable light. This may also explain why he has invited Canadian trad-Catholic Davis Aurini on this year, as Aurini has similar form.

E. Michael Jones

The elderly and cadaverous-looking intellectual E. Michael Jones is always a popular choice on wignat shows that want to tone down their rabid Jew hatred. This is because the former Catholic academic only hates Jews in a weird "spiritual sense" that has nothing whatsoever to do with race. EMJ has written several books in which a WASP-Jewish elite oppress Catholic Americans by forcing them to watch porn in the suburbs. He often travels to Africa and believes that Western civilisation can be saved by getting rid of atheistic Whites and replacing them with Catholics from Africa. Woes's 25% Italian blood means that he is in with a chance in EMJ's New World Order. 

J.F.Gariepy

It wouldn't be Milleniyule without JF and his Pepe Le Pew comedy French accent. JF is known for his close association with notorious dead pedophile billionaire and Mossad operative Jeffrey Epstein. In his former career as a scientist, JF did research that was funded by Epstein, despite holding extreme Nazi views. But whereas Epstein liked physically immature women, JF only prefers them to be mentally immature. He also likes hanging out with actual retards, as attested by his many livestreams with Richard Spencer. More recently JF played a key role in getting Nick Fuentes kicked off YouTube. If for this reason and nothing else, it is wise for Woes to stay on good terms with him, as Woes's YouTube channel is hanging by a thread.

Mike Enoch

Woes' recent experience of being accused of sexual shenanigans has made him more aware of those who have suffered real sexual abuse. Oddly this includes his guest for Monday the 28th, Mike Enoch, the much respected Fuhrer of the built-to-fail National Jewstice Party. While Enoch's followers see him as a strongman figure, he is actually a pathetic victim of sexual abuse. As a henpecked Jewish husband, he was apparently forced to have sex against his will by his demanding Jewish ex-wife. While people often laugh at these victims of "reverse service sex" the psychological scars run very deep as Enoch can attest.

Frodi Midjord

The soft-spoken Faroe Islander is a popular presence on the Nazi and Alt-Right and thus the perfect person to fill the Xmas Eve 10 pm graveyard shift. Frodi, who is named after a hobbit, is the organizer of the Panzy Forum, a well-known get-together for international Hitler enthusiasts like Greg Johnson and Churchill apologists like Millennial Woes. Woes of course went hardcore Neo-Nazi after he was doxxed in the wake of the 2016 Heilgate fiasco. Likewise Frodi can also be found at Ukrainian Nazi Metal festivals like the Pact of Steel where the shirts and ties come off and the swastika tattoos and strap-ons come out. 

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