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'Dead' Billionaire Jeffrey Epstein has been awarded a medal for his courage in getting "extremely compromising footage" of Prince Andrew and dozens of other important VIPs. 

Although officially dead, Epstein (68) was able to attend the ceremony, held at MOSSAD's Jerusalem Headquarters, because being actually dead is not quite the same thing as being officially dead. 

In the former case one is still able to attend garden parties, film premieres, and Satanic rituals, while in the latter, maggots feast on your brain while you take a "dirt nap" from which you never awaken.

Epstein, wearing a spotlessly white admiral's uniform, told waiting reporters that he had never felt better, but was a "little sorry" for the tramp they killed and put in his place when he was 'spirited away' from his high security prison in 2019.

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