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NEW SCHEME TO STOP TOURISTS BEING RAPED AND MURDERED IN SOUTH AFRICA


South Africa is one of the most dangerous countries in the World. It is even more dangerous if you are a Boer, or if you are simply mistaken for one. 

This is because members of the governing African National Congress (ANC), along with other prominent politicians like Julius Malema of the Economic Freedom Fighters (EFF), regularly encourage their supporters to "kill the Boers" with songs and words to that effect.

This is really bad news if you are a tourist who just happens to look like one of the hated Boers. Because then you may attract the attentions of an ANC or EFF machete gang, keen to make amends for Apartheid by brutally raping and torturing you for several hours, using knives and boiling water, while slitting your children's faces to look like "The Joker" in the Batman films.

To avoid such unfortunate mix-ups, a company in South Africa has introduced a new range of clothing that clearly tells would-be attackers that the person wearing the garment is in fact NOT a Boer. 


There are nevertheless problems with the scheme, as many Black South Africans have forgotten how to read since the end of Apartheid, as school standards have fallen off a cliff. 

Also, many ANC and EFF activists may suspect that you are simply a Boer posing as a tourist to avoid being brutally raped and tortured for several hours, and thus brutally rape and torture you for several hours just on the off chance, as they hate other White people almost as much as the Boers anyway.


Bearing in mind all the difficulties and dangers that a trip to South Africa involves, our advice is just to go to Spain or Costa Rica instead, if you must have a bit of sunshine.

6 comments

Anonymous said...

I was a nigger in South Africa, I would immediately kill any white wearing such a shirt, just for the sheer innuendo that I was a murderous animal. Now, true, that would be an accurate innuendo, but still, it's insulting nevertheless. It's like knowing someone is godawful ugly, but do you TELL them that? Same thing - we know South African niggers are murderous animals, but do you TELL them that? Not a good idea. Very bad, in fact.

Anonymous said...

Any white tourist in South Africa who would wear such a shirt deserves to be killed.

Gem Junior said...

So I guess the implication is that Boers are fair game for torture and murder. I am not sure whether I should laugh or cry. Truly this is one of the most disgusting things I’ve ever seen.

Seagull said...

Your comments about killing show the level of your intelligence, sadly, it is painfully low. Grow up anonymous! My thoughts tell me you are the animal.
Sad creature lost in a world of bitterness, white envy, black self hate and ignorance.

Nick Gurr said...

You need to go to South Africa wearing a T-shirt that says: "Please Don't Kill Me! I'll Suck Your Nigger Dick If You Don't!" And they you suck five niggers off and they kill you anyway!!! Hardy! Har! Har!

Anonymous said...

Didn't think these animals were smart enough to read

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