CUK PARTY SPLITS AFTER MOST POINTLESS CAREER IN POLITICAL HISTORY
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| Goodbye Change UK and thanks for the acronym. |
Reports are coming in that the CUK Party (aka "Change UK") has split in two, and is now even more pointless than it was a few hours ago.
The Party, which was launched recently, was composed of 11 ex-Labour and Tory MPs, all of whom jumped ship from their respective parties in order to "change" the shape of British politics by campaigning to reverse Brexit while also blaming Jeremy Corbyn for anti-Semitism.
Unfortunately for these daring MPs who sacrificed their prospects in Britain's two big parties to launch a risky new party, no one was interested in its message, as it was too similar to the Lib Dems, the established third party in Brit politics.
After the CUK Party did extremely poorly at the recent European elections, the 11 MPs started to in-fight.
One group -- Chuka Umunna (ex Lab), Heidi Allen (ex Tory), Gavin Shuker (ex Lab), Luciana Berger (ex Lab), Angela Smith (ex Lab), and Sarah Wollaston (ex Tory) -- pushed to merge the now pointless new party with the Lib Dems in order to save their careers.
Meanwhile another group -- Anna Soubry (ex Tory), Chris Leslie (ex Lab), Joan Ryan (ex Lab), Mikes Gapes (ex Lab), and Ann Coffey (ex Lab) -- pushed to keep the party going, probably to maintain control over the large funds poured into the new party by mysterious donors.
The pro-merger group was defeated, and has now quit the party. These MPs will probably join the Lib Dems in the hope of holding onto their seats at the next election.
As for the remnant of the party, its prospects are dire. Trad News confidently predicts it will disappear up its own arse within days or possibly minutes, and be all but forgotten, except for its hilarious acronym, which will continue to be joked about for centuries by generations as yet unborn.
One group -- Chuka Umunna (ex Lab), Heidi Allen (ex Tory), Gavin Shuker (ex Lab), Luciana Berger (ex Lab), Angela Smith (ex Lab), and Sarah Wollaston (ex Tory) -- pushed to merge the now pointless new party with the Lib Dems in order to save their careers.
Meanwhile another group -- Anna Soubry (ex Tory), Chris Leslie (ex Lab), Joan Ryan (ex Lab), Mikes Gapes (ex Lab), and Ann Coffey (ex Lab) -- pushed to keep the party going, probably to maintain control over the large funds poured into the new party by mysterious donors.
The pro-merger group was defeated, and has now quit the party. These MPs will probably join the Lib Dems in the hope of holding onto their seats at the next election.
As for the remnant of the party, its prospects are dire. Trad News confidently predicts it will disappear up its own arse within days or possibly minutes, and be all but forgotten, except for its hilarious acronym, which will continue to be joked about for centuries by generations as yet unborn.
2 comments
How does an MP get elected in one party, then switch without getting the voters' permission, i.e., in a new election? Undoubtedly most of them would not have gotten elected if they had stood for a different party in the first place. There needs to be a disclaimer on the ballot: Dear Voter: Thank you for agreeing to further my political career. Please be advised that I reserve the right to take any position and join with any collection of members that suits my political ambitions and my whim of the moment. Sincerely, your supremely talented and moral member who is too good merely to represent marks like you.
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