FRENCH LEFTIST DEGENERACY AND RIGHT-WING COCK SLAPPING

We on the Alt Right have long trumpeted the idea that politics follows culture. Well, to add to that list of Alt Right tenets, we can now add a new one:

Personal political preferences indicate whether you favour wife swapping, a ‘penis slap,’ or a manky threesome.

A report conducted by "libertine social network" Wyylde found that French leftists liked to engage in behaviours that might be described as "cuckoldry" or just flat out degenerate. Group sex, sharing your girlfriend, and an aversion to soap and water, it seems, have an empirical connection with being a Leftist.

The report found that a whopping 37% of those who vote for the hard left say they've been in threesomes, compared to 19% of far right voters, 13% for centre right and 15% for centre left.

When hard leftists aren't engaging in threesomes or putting out the welcome mat to illegal African immigrants, they’re also keen on one night stands and polyamorous relationships. None of this should come come as surprise to readers of  Alt Right News as we could have saved Wyylde some euros and sent them Moldylocks facebook profile instead.

The report also said that followers of the Right-wing Front National were more likely to engage in practices related to "porn culture." Which translates as “spanking, facial ejaculation, and penis slapping" (?). Interestingly the report links such preferences to Front National supporters being "less influenced by feminist culture."

Armed with this analysis we can now speculate and offer a more nuanced critique of the second round of the French Presidential election.