"CREEPY JOE" SUCKS THE LIFE FORCE OUT OF ANOTHER SMALL CHILD TO BOOST ENERGY LEVELS FOR CAMPAIGN

Biden's most recent victim now a shrivelled-up husk barely alive.

People have got Joe Biden wrong. By now almost everyone thinks the 2020 Presidential candidte is a disgusting old sex pervert, who isn't happy unless his hands are probing and exploring the curves and grooves of an underage child. 

But what they don't realise is that the truth is even stranger, because Biden is in fact a form of "ammit" -- an ancient Egyptian creature that once feasted on the souls of the dead, and was deified by the superstitious Egyptians.

The only difference is that, instead of the souls of the recently deceased, Biden prefers to feast on the souls of the living, seeking out the youngest members because of their superior life force. 

Also, instead of consuming the souls of his victims wholesale in a vortex of screaming pain, he prefers to gently inhale their essence and strength -- rather like licking a lollipop --while quietly fondling them to assuage their confusion. 

The Ammit in its more conventional form.

The fact that he operates in this surreptitious way and has assumed the shape and form of a kindly old man instead of a scary-looking monstrosity with a body that is one-third lion, one-third hippopotamus, and one-third crocodile, means that he faces much less resistance than a normal Ammit would. 

This allows his ancient soul-sucking appetites to be satisfied with relative impunity.

Although Biden's "official" age is listed as 76, he is believed to be much, much older. Because of this he requires a constant supply of nubile young victims replete with the life force to stop him slipping into an eternal coma.

His bid to become President of the United States is thought by experts to be an attempt to secure a steady supply of fresh, innocent victims. But ironically it also places additional strains on his energy requirements, meaning that his need to grope the young is now stronger than ever.

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